beauty and death

I was watching two pairs of two children play with eachother outside… but they were playing so wonderfully I was amazed at how they were dancing. Christy sat behind me playing and singing the most beautiful song. Eva was in the back and started playing harmonica with Christy and soon just stopped to listen to this beautiful song. Someone came in and told me they were going to take their temperature, Christy left. I told Eva that we wanted to have her and Carlos over for dinner, but really just to play games. I was sort of walking around her as I spoke. Eva then took a caterpillar off my sweater that had attached himself there.

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Man, this morning was tragic. I apparently had several younger siblings, two toddlers and two babies. My brothers ( 22 and 27 ) and I were babysitting our new members, who we had for some reason just met. We were at a family reunion. There was a stairwell that did not have a banister. The toddlers kept perching their bums right on the edge, I kept taking them off. Then they grabbed the babies to hold in their lap on the edge! I swooped them up several times, and they seemed to think it was a funny game, until one of the babies fell to the ground. They still didn't seem to understand that baby was dead now. It was horrible. The dream went on all morning, and followed through the next couple days in the dream of telling our mother, and mourning and crying and dealing with this awful death . I finally woke up and stopped trying to sleep because it was so sad.